It occurred to me in my communion state this morning that my own definition of Love needed to be clarified. I write about it a lot, and I want to be sure that I am making myself as clear as possible. You may notice that I capitalize this word when I write of it in the grander sense. I’m talking so grand that it took me a lifetime to be able to embody it to the degree that I do. I couldn’t tell you where I’m at on humanity’s official Universal Scale of Embodied Love, but I know that I’m ‘holding my own’ as they say. The Love I speak of isn’t just ‘nice’… it’s full-on kick-ass.
Here is where I find that the biggest misconception occurs. When spiritual, new-age type people say, “Hey, let’s all just live together in peace, love and harmony”, the rational mind can come up with all kinds of reasons to reject that because the words feel weak and ungrounded. I agree, it does feel ungrounded most of the time that I hear it too, and the term ‘weakness’ is simply a translation from a feeling that something is missing… or not fully present and available. It’s true. Love must be grounded or embodied in order for that kind of kick-ass power to be directed into this world.
What does embodied Love feel like? Well from my vantage point today I can say that it is pure ecstasy, knowing wisdom, strength, freedom, peace. But it didn’t always feel like that. Have you ever felt pain and all-out terror when Love comes a calling? Unless you have shouted out and begged for mercy because it’s too much, I would venture to say that you have not yet been introduced to the kind of Love that I refer to when I say LOVE. It is not an experience that you want to invite unless you are truly committed to giving up all that you think you are, know, want, believe, etc., and trade it all in for total conscious connection with ALL THAT IS – indescribable Beauty, Power, Abundance and Grace right HERE… at your fingertips. But you must be advised, this kind of Love is here to destroy all that is NOT in alignment with Total Peace and Balance, and will, if allowed, completely transform you into – not the word “love” – but the experience of LOVE. In other words, you might have the intellectual capacity to deliver a brilliant speech about love or even LOVE, but you’ll know right where you are on the universal scale of embodied Love when one tiny little gram of THIS is introduced into your physical, feeling body. Either you’ll run screaming and begging to be returned to the ‘comfortably numb’ state, or you’ll muster up the courage to continue with what was introduced to me so many years ago as the ‘stretching exercises’ – exercises that I guess I agreed to before this life, because that’s been the program folks.
One aspect of this ‘program’ that I have written more about on my other blog site, “What I Know by Heart“, is that in this life, for reasons I understand a whole lot more now about than I ever did back then, I have kept myself quite naive to the ways of the world. While I am a very enthusiastic supporter of education, my own scholarly ventures ended after two years of college – and even that ‘information’ has not really been retained. The only intellectual knowledge that is available to me now is that which is applicable in the moment that I need it. That’s it. It’s there when I truly need it, and no other time. Present moment existence is like that. I know what I need to know when I need to know it, which I have found frees one up to really KNOW – to feel and perceive the spaces in between all of the letters, words, and ‘stories’ of this world.
I remember years ago when I stumbled upon a verse from Rilke’s “Duino Elegies”. I cannot tell you how relieved I was to find someone whom I could relate to when it comes to the ‘terror’ of Love.
Excerpt from Elegy 1.
“Who, if I cried out, would hear me among the angels’ hierarchies?
and even if one of them pressed me suddenly against his heart:
I would be consumed in that overwhelming existence.
For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror, which we are still just
able to endure,
and we are so awed because it serenely disdains to annihilate us.
Every angel is terrifying.
And so I hold myself back and swallow the call-note of my dark sobbing.
Ah, whom can we ever turn to in our need?
Not angels, not humans, and already the knowing animals are aware
that we are not really at home in our interpreted world.”
Rainer Maria Rilke, (read “Duino Elegies 1st & 2nd” in its entirety)
Ah yes, “…it serenely disdains to annihilate us.” Thank you Rilke. I truly could not have said it better. The entire poem is a real gift. It was like an oasis to me when I came upon it on my desert journey a few decades ago. I eventually glued it to my keyboard so that every time I sang out my melodies and words – even if the audience was convinced that I was singing about my latest boyfriend – I knew differently.
The stretching exercises still come, although they don’t fall so much under the header of ‘unbearable’. I am able to welcome it, trust it, and fall into the bliss of it more readily. Yet in the closing of the stretch, I am still taken to that dis-comfort zone of ‘this far and no farther’. While I do find myself looking forward to the next – excited to take it on and take it in – these days it seems to be more about the practice of being IT in the world… between the stretchings. I smile when I think back about how I used to curse the ‘program’ – obviously not in understanding of what was happening to me. As difficult as it all was, I am now able to see it as having been a beautiful blessing. I have been informed by Love that this is my life’s work. After all of this training and stretching, I am able to help others embrace and embody this kind of Love now. I have noticed though, there are not many standing in line for this. Which means that a) everybody is already there, or b) I’m terrible at marketing (proven track record here), or c) quite possibly people are not excruciatingly uncomfortable enough with the way things are, and somehow, through sheer will they’re still able to make it all work. If that’s the case, why on Earth would you want to invite the destroyer version of LOVE into your life?
So I suppose this is an addendum to my previous post, “2012?…”. LOVE is total ecstasy if it has a unified, welcoming consciousness and body to be present with. In a few year’s time, if you have not already lost your mind and your human identity, and surrendered to the experience of the Larger YOU, this degree of Love will more than likely be terrifying. And until we embody at least some degree of this Love, we simply cannot create a successful Loving, Peaceful, Harmonious way of life in the “interpreted world”. Wanting to change the world into a peaceful one without first welcoming the Divine Roto-Rooter into your own heart is like a politician saying he’s for cleaning up the environment but no one is ever invited into his house because the sewer is backed up and the whole place is full of shit! … or something like that. You get my drift. If you can’t embody IT, than how on Earth can you direct it or create with it or be given the responsibility to do so? Even nice sounding words and intentions can be a defense or distraction against the inevitable embodiment of Love.
Like many others on this planet, I have been gifted with visions. I see it. I feel it. I know it… we are all going to be stretched to receive more. Ready or not.
“All I am saying”… (everybody all together now) …” is give PEACE (and kick-ass LOVE) a chance” … in YOU! And guess what? When this happens, we won’t be talking about changing the world anymore. Poof! Magic! It’s done!