This is a full-circle dialogue between ‘I’ and ‘Other’. It is an artistic rendering inspired by a feeling dialogue that I had a few years ago. I’ve been following this exercise ever since. It changed my life then, and continues to do so now. Each time I land in the present moment, it is more powerful and transformative than the last. Incidentally, this was when I discovered how beautifully the structure of Benevolent Magic and Living Prayers (through Robert Shapiro) blended with my own work. I use Benevolent Magic now on a daily basis!
In this case, “I” emerged from a meditative state. “O” symbolizes the voice of ‘other’ or from the ‘ego’ state, if you will – the voice that has been highly conditioned by parents, teachers, friends, and the western world in general.
Note who begins the dialogue and who ends.
I: I am at peace.
O: Yeah? So what will you do now?
O: [Laughter] You can’t do no-thing!
I: I am.
O: You are what?
I: I am.
O: The world outside is falling apart and you do nothing! On top of it, you make no sense!
I: While I have compassion for those who suffer, I am not there. I am here.
O: You could do something. So maybe you’re not presidential material, but you’re an artist. The least you could do is write a song!
I: I am a song but you cannot hear.
O: You’re impossible. If you do nothing than why are you here?
I: I am here. You are not.
O: But I am here. I’m right here with you… right now!
I: It’s good to have you here. Now what do you feel?
O: Not that it matters, but I feel anger… frustration. Confusion!
O: Oh. So you’re at peace and you want me to feel anger? Great.
I: It’s good to know what you feel.
O: Why? Before this I felt ready to go out and do something useful. Now I just feel bad.
I: Before this you had no awareness of these feelings, and you would have unknowingly created from this place. There are already enough of these creations in your world, no?
O: OK. I feel angry. Now what?
I: Do you feel anything else?
O: Well. Now that you mention it, I feel tired. My knee is hurting again…(sigh). I really hate my job. I’m sad… my daughter is growing up… we don’t talk much. Oh my god I’m sad. Now I’m crying! Look what you’ve done! Before I felt ready to take on the world and now I’m crying. What good can possibly come of this? I feel ashamed at my not being able to control…
I: There is no shame in crying. I welcome your feelings.
O: [After some time has passed] …I didn’t even know I could cry. All those feelings…I really had no idea that I felt all of that. None of this makes sense.
I: Makes sense to me. An idea is very different from a feeling. You can’t think feelings. So what do you feel now?
O: Nothing. I mean… I feel good. Strange. I never thought I could feel good after ‘losing it’.
I: Losing it? What is ‘it’?
O: I guess it’s… everything. Everything I thought I was supposed to… I mean…
I: Who is speaking now?
O: I don’t know. I’m still confused.
I: Do you feel confused?
O: What a weird question. I guess I don’t actually feel confused. I feel… I feel… a strange sort of peace. I’m tingling… my hands, my legs, my head. It feels so good. What’s happening to me?
I: What do you want?
O: What do mean, what do I want? [Long pause]
I: What do you want to create now? No limitations.
O: What? …wow. I don’t know. I mean… I feel different. What I’m saying is I guess I don’t feel the same about what I used to want. Those things were more of what I thought I wanted. I don’t really want that anymore.
I: It’s good to know what you don’t want. Now what do you want?
O: There’s so much energy! What is this? My heart is getting really warm… You’re saying that I can create what I want now? This is amazing. Will it actually happen? I feel like it could. I’ve never felt so much energy!
I: What do you want?
O: I… I want to continue to feel this!
I: Excellent start.
O: …and I want to feel this joy… all the time. I want to share it with others. There must be a new way for me to express this. This energy doesn’t seem to fit… or it doesn’t seem to want to do things the old way… or the way I thought… Great. Now I’m not sure what I want.
I: Then stick with what you want to feel.
O: Oh, OK. I want to feel peace, excitement, fulfillment… and love… in everything I do. Oh god, all of this love makes me cry. It’s a good sort of cry… I don’t want to forget this!
I: You were doing great until you stated what you didn’t want. Continue with what you want.
O: I want to be able to recall this feeling of power always. Oh dear God, I know I’m going to forget this. How can I recall this… always?
I: Knowing what you feel leads to feeling what you KNOW.
O: So you’re saying that if I forget, I can just do all of this again and I’ll remember?
I: Yes. And when you remember, ask for what you want in that peaceful present moment, along with all of those warm tingly feelings, and it will be so.
O: You mean it’s really that simple? Wow. I can ask for anything?
I: You can ask for anything. Requests that come from Love in this way, will benefit all Life. Therefore it will be so. What are you feeling now?
O: I am at peace.
I: Yeah? So what will you do now?
I: [Laughter] Nothing.
I: I Am.