Oh Baby Let Me Turn You Off

I was watching the television broadcast of a popular radio show this morning. It was a one-camera set up in the studio and offered the viewer a peek behind the scenes of the radio host, his guest and the producer. I enjoyed that, but what I find that I enjoy the most is what happens when they go to commercial break. Now granted the participants are well aware that the cameras are still rolling, so they are still guarded to a degree, but it got me thinking about this idea of how much people change when the ON switch gets turned OFF in their everyday lives. The biggest shift I notice is that we allow our bodies to ‘let go’ in ways that help us to breathe more deeply – like changing into baggy, comfy clothes; as well as allowing our bodies more freedom to release and make sound in ways that aren’t considered so polite in mixed company. Now we may allow our bodies to ‘do what they have to do’ in off time, but how much freedom do we give our minds to relax, to loosen up, to let go? How often do we just feel, and just be who we truly are?

Now we don’t have to look far these days to notice humanity’s growing fascination with what happens when the ‘show’ is over. Particularly, we want to know more about our favorite (as well as not so favorite) celebrities ‘real’ lives. Are they getting fat? Are they really happy in their marriage? What do they look like without makeup? Do their kids ever get in trouble? C’mon, what are they really like? It’s almost like we want them to experience everyday human bumbling so that we can relax with our own bumblings. And how ’bout those reality shows? …well that just speaks to the evolution of this growing voyeuristic phenomenon. Now mind you, reality TV is not the end-all of capturing total honesty, but what this reveals to me is that there is a hungry population of television viewers and internet surfers out there who are demanding to experience the REAL – or the best version of it that media has to offer.

In the example of fanatical celebrity watching, it seems we are desperate to dismantle Hollywood’s image of perfection so that we can truly KNOW the star. And wouldn’t you know, with this latest shift in the direction of reality TV (and interactive TV for that matter) we are turning everyday folk like ourselves into stars! Personally, I feel what this translates to is that we are collectively turning the probing camera back onto ourselves.

How much do you KNOW about the real you? When your show is over, just how much off-switch time do you have? Do you allow others to really see you? And how different are you from the role(s) that you play on the ‘big screen’ as well as the small screen in your own home – with your own family? Is it even possible for the probing camera to get a few shots of the real YOU?

Well, thanks to our Creator, we do have a built-in switch for ‘off’ time. It’s called sleep. Well, we’re supposed to be sleeping, but with the recent barrage of TV commercials about these fabulous little pills that help us to drift away into conveniently scheduled 8-hour comas, it’s obvious that we’re so ON all the time that we’re having trouble turning it OFF. If we do manage to get some sleep, whether it’s coma induced or the good ‘ol fashioned kind, you can bet that we’re having a few production meetings with our producer, director, writers, set design team, etc. Various agenda topics for our meeting might be: How to create better lighting on the subject; address complaints about the lack of healthy foods on the set; discussion of a few re-writes to keep the show true-to-form; maybe even some coaching on a more authentic performance.

Keeping the show true to form. Whose truth? Whose form? Now what is this story about again? Who wrote it? What’s the message? How do you feel about the message? Thanks to the plethora of reality TV shows, documentary films, and behind-the-scenes special features, we are becoming more conscious now of the building blocks, as well as the various contributors and influence for our collective human stories. I feel that this is a mirror for our own personal story. We have more opportunity and permission now to really examine our intentions, influence, motive, skill, and our level of integrity in the production of our own lives here on Earth. For instance, are we consciously creating or have we lost ourselves in the character and script of someone else’s story? If you were to meet with your production team regularly, in both night and day time meetings, to design and BE the most powerful, passionate, inspiring and truthful story you could be; what might that look like in REAL time… and when can you begin?

I experienced a crisis with all of this as a ‘performer’ several years back. I never liked the idea of performing; I just wanted to be me and share what comes to me and through me. While I’ve come closer to achieving this in recent times, I’m still ever so conscious of that little gap in behavior between the ‘on’ and ‘off’ switch. The whole reason that I decided to record a solo album and book shows in the first place was to see if I could accurately capture, in front of an audience, the enormity of the feeling power of the messages when they initially came to me. It took several years to bridge into something that was only somewhat close to that intention. Those powerful moments did occur in public when I was lost in the music and the feeling of it all, but when I would start thinking again, POOF! It would be gone. I then stopped performing altogether due to irreconcilable differences between the heights of what I could achieve in my OFF time and what I displayed for others in the ON time. It’s probably why I began my channeling work around the time I took a hiatus from singing. I trained for two years to let go of control and allow a larger benevolent energy to come through. I couldn’t perform channeling if I tried! I don’t know how other channels feel, but I am under the impression that when we rise and meet the vibration of wise and loving teachers in this way, we are getting used to the idea that WE are that large and that wise as well, and it’s OK to begin channeling this now – into this world; in front of God and everyone!

I wonder how much we unconsciously tailor or conform our art and performance in any area of our life to meet or match expectations, i.e. be true to form. I’d like to eliminate any and all pretense or conformity when I share in front of an audience. Maybe other artists can relate to this. When I am alone I am able to achieve ecstatic states of …I couldn’t tell you what. It’s just not a rendition or performance of a song. It feels more like a real-time, present moment expression of I AM in the form of music, and it feels so good that when it’s done I return completely changed and more alive than I have ever been or thought was possible. In other words, I AM the song, the notes, the resonance, and that feels to me like ‘TRUTH to form’. My feeling is that this may be the spiritual evolution of music, acting, dance, and well… all creative forms of expression as a result of the spiritual evolution of human. In other words, the palette is getting a whole lot bigger and the dynamic moving canvas is anything but true to form or expectation. I say we need to encourage the artist in everyone to really take off, fly free, fly far; and to always appreciate the height, distance and depth that they are willing to go to find more; be more. And let’s always applaud each other in how grand and graceful the delivery of this true life, present moment story is in form.

So I’d like to turn the projector off now, bring up the house lights, and introduce myself.

I am here.
This is me.
This is true.
This is real.

Just tell me that I’ve turned you off and I’ll be happy.

To channeled benevolent guidance: It seems that we get caught up in acting out other peoples stories, meeting other’s expectations with the roles that we play and with the expectations we have of others. It seems these stories are based on the past, or the future projected from the past. What does being the ‘real’ story in the present moment look like, and how can we feel completely safe in sharing it with others?

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